Saturday, February 2, 2013

Sojourn: A temporary stay

 Hello Lovelies!

How are all of you? I hope you're good. I'm good.

Anyways so let's start off this post with a definition. (We're learning here people!)

sojourn: a temporary stay

Alrighty, now that we've established that, I can really talk about what I was going to in the first place.

So this spring break that's coming up I'm going on this trip called Sojourn to the Past which in short, takes you to five states in the South, reliving the Civil Right's movement of the US in the 60's. From Georgia to Tennessee, it'll be a ten day journey of learning about the injustices that happened in our own country and that sadly, aren't completely gone. I think the coolest part of the trip is that we get to meet people, the people who lived the movement, actively participated in it, and we get to hear them talk about it and talk to them about it. Oh I should probably mention that this isn't just like some fun easy trip, we've got to read 3 books before the trip, do work while on the trip, while lugging around this HUGE binder of information we're going to be using for our classroom sessions along the way. What I mean is that it's like a moving-classroom type thing where one day we'll do a lesson in a hotel conference room, the next on a bus, and the next at a site. It's going to be an incredibly grueling and rewarding trip, I think. But what I'm really, really, really excited about isn't just the trip... I get to spend these ten days not only with a couple of friends (actually I'm kind of dreading this because one of my best friend's really close friend is going and her and I don't really get along) and my favorite teacher. My history teacher who is just an amazing person in general is coming with us so I'm so stoked to spend the ten days along side her. She truly get's my love for Bobby Kennedy (her true love is Thomas Jefferson). XD

Alright, moving onto topic numero dos.

I've had this song playing on repeat in the background while I've been writing this post because I'm really into it right now.
Primadonna by Marina and the Diamonds
Okay, so the video is a little odd, but the song is just very good. You have to listen to it and wait for the beat to drop...that's when it gets REALLY good. Just wanted to let you guys into my brain for a little to know what's been going through it. Well anyways.

The last thing I wanted to say is that I'm going to try to write a new post every Saturday. I apparently am not very good at keeping these goals, but you know what, I'm challenging myself here and really trying to follow through with this. So check in every Saturday for new posts! Please?

XOXO Briggitte.

Saturday, January 26, 2013


Hey guys... So that awkward moment when that book club idea just didn't work... I'm sorry! Anyways, I know I haven't blogged in a while... and well that's okay. Sorta... 

So Hello! If you're wondering why the "Hello" in my title is in quotations... It's because of this YouTuber named Hannah Hart. 

Just a usual on My Drunk Kitchen
Her love for her fans<3
She has a show called My Drunk Kitchen and right now it's my favorite web series on YouTube. I've gotten really into it in these past few weeks (thanks to a really good friend of mine who knows probably every YouTuber on YouTube) but yeah. So back to explaining about the title... her signature opening to her videos start with a "Hello!" She's a very talented person (vlogger, singer, songwriter, cook) and I've gotten to really like her. She's very inspirational (not because of her drunk cooking!, but because of the other vlogs she does about her life and her story) and I find it very hard not to love her. So if you're's a fan-made video about the highlights of My Drunk Kitchen and in the first little bit you'll see the "Hello!"'s that I'm talking about. Okay I guess I'm done promoting her now... 
Okay I'm shamelessly promoting her...
but do go and check her channel out.

Anyways... just wanted to tell you about that because I'm letting you guys catch up on my life. 

The first semester of my junior year just finished this past Friday and boy am I relieved. It's been a hard year.... I've never struggled so much in a class (Physics Honors) before, and I've never had such low grades before (anything below a B was unthinkable until now) so I was feeling kind of down about myself for a really long time. You see I've always thought (since I was like 5) that I wanted to be a doctor when I grew up, and I was so set on that. Until this year. I mean I feel like I've sorta changed this year. I don't really know  if it's a good change or not.... But anyways. I don't think I want to be a doctor anymore. For as long as I can remember, the two classes I've struggled in the most in school were math and science. I mean I always made it by with decent grades in these subjects (A's and B's...usually B's in math) and this year, I feel like I'm just on a sinking ship. The damn Titanic of physics is taking me down and it's been the most stressful time because of it. I've been balancing between a D+ at one point of the year, to a C- to most of the year, and last time I checked I had a solid C... which, I mean from a D+ is a good improvement... but even then, I feel dreadful about. And I know it's not pleasing my parents at all...especially my dad. I mean now I have a tutor to help (which I mean I guess it does help) but still, I'm really just praying that I didn't fail this final and hoping that by some miracle I'd be able to bring my grade up to at least a B- on my semester report card... I don't know. I just kind of hated myself for this whole year (up until to a couple of weeks ago) because I thought I was just dumb and not getting it and I was letting my parents down...but most importantly me... And now, I think I've reached the point where I've come to accept it. I'm just not good at science. I'm a decent cook at math (this year I've had an A for the first time in a math class) but I've kind of resigned my hopes of being a doctor. Is this irrational? I don't really know. I do enjoy history a lot (not sure I want to go into that as a career), I enjoy languages and linguistics, so I'm kinda looking into that... I just don't know... and I really hate being incisive about a thing like my future... I just don't know.

Wow, so I didn't think I'd write that much about that... but yeah. I know what I want to talk about now too... but I'll save that 'till next post... it involves this:
Just a little teaser ;)

So be sure to tune in (read in?) next time!


Monday, August 20, 2012

Liebster Blog Award

So... I was awarded this awhile ago by the wonderful Runell from The Shades of Black and White and so now I'm finally writing it out. Rules, from my understanding are these:

ONE: I have to write 11 new things about myself.
TWO: I've got to answer 11 questions based on what the person that awarded me this award asked.
THREE: I have to tag 11 bloggers.
FOUR: I have to ask the future recipients 11 questions.

So, shall I begin?

Eleven Things You Don't Know About Me
(perhaps you do, but in that instance, just pretend you don't)

1. I'm fluent in English and Spanish, but can speak exactly two words of Arabic and a 
tiny bit of Italian.
2. I share a birthday with Joseph Kennedy Sr.
3. I have brown eyes, but with the right lighting, they change color to a more honey or sometimes
greenish color.
4. I have an obsession with lighting matches. (I don't like lighting things on fire though!)
5. I love singing, although I'm not very good at it.
6. I can bend my thumb behind my forefinger knuckle.
7. I can recite about 95% of the movies Singin' In The Rain and Raiders of 
the Lost Ark by heart.
8. I've been told I look Middle Eastern when in fact I'm Mexican and Colombian.
9. I listen to music for at least a good two hours everyday.
10. I've always wanted to be a doctor, but I've been questioning myself recently
because of my strong interest in history, language, and literature.
11. I'm scared of heights, bees, and clowns.

Runell's Eleven Questions

1. Who is your least favorite actor? Shia LaBeouf.
2. Despite the fact that you don't like the actor, do you have a film that you really like with him starring in it? Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull.
3. A popular film that you'll never be able to understand why it's so popular? The Graduate. I tried watching 
it. Tried to understand what all the fuss was about. Yup. Nothing. Just creeped out a bit.
4. A film that you really, really want to see, but haven't yet had the chance to? The Artist.
5. What film of your favorite actress is your least favorite? Lucille Ball's The Magic Carpet.
6. A favorite actor or actress who didn't make as many films as you wished that they had? James Dean.
7. Do you have a film that, if not anything else, you love the dialogue? Singin' in the Rain. I love that movie
all around though. 
8. Favorite film composer? John Williams.
9. Do you have a film that you love, but didn't like the way it ended, and so you wish you could remake the ending to suit what you believe should have happened? To Kill a Mockingbird. Not only do I wish
it would have gone on, but I've always felt like there needed to be something after. AND Tom Robinson should have been innocent. 
10. In your opinion, who do you think is the most underrated actor and/or actress? Desi Arnaz. Go watch his Bataan death scene and then come talk to me.
12. A film that no matter what, you'll never watch it? Saw.

My Eleven

1. Favorite Alfred Hitchcock film? 
2. Would you rather go to a sock-hop or a disco (original)?
3. If your favorite actor wasn't an actor, what job would you want him to have?
4. If your favorite actress wasn't an actress, what job would you want her to have.
5. If you could have a conversation with an actor/actress who would it be?
6. Weirdest film you've seen?
7. Bobby-socks and saddle shoes or bell bottoms?
8. Actor/actress who in your opinion was gone too soon from this life?
9. Someone you swoon over every time you hear them speak?
10. Biggest tragedy in Hollywood history?
11. How often do you listen to music?

The Chosen Ones

Well...there ya have it folks. 

Sunday, August 12, 2012

YA Trilat 2012 Journal

Well hello there. For any of you who wondered why I wasn't uploading for a while it's because I've been kinda gone for the last 3 weeks on this amazing program that I'd love to share about with you.

Well for starters, its name: Youth Ambassadors Trilateral North America Exchange 2012.
What does that mean? Well youth ambassadors are young people (like me) chosen to be ambassadors from the city they come from. Trilateral North American Exchange. This program had kids from Canada, California, and Mexico. So viola! North America. It was a program put together by Sister Cities International, an organization that works with cities all over the world to make exchanges like these possible. So I'm from Culver City and my two sister cities are Lethbridge, Alberta, Canada and Uruapan, Michoacan, Mexico. Well I guess I'll just let my journal speak for itself. Enjoy!

YA Trilat 2012 Journal
By: Briggitte Suastegui
June 28th, 2012
Well hello there. My godmother, being the wonderful person she is, sent me this journal/notebook as a present, so I’m going to put it to good use. It won’t be a diary, I already have that, it’ll be mainly for my upcoming trip and just some thoughts in general. For my trip, I’ll be staying about a week in UCLA with leadership training, having a Canadian exchange student stay with me at my house for about a week, and then going to Washington D.C. for another week. I’m excited. I wish I could think of more meaningful things to write right now, but I can’t. I will though, eventually.
July 18th, 2012
First day of the program. First day at UCLA. Mom left me to hang out with Lilah, Elana, and Venkat. It was fine. We had an orientation in a room and we met a lot of people. I met my Canadian girl, Jocelyn. She’s nice. Another girl that came with her from Canada is named Camilla, and she’s become my good friend. She’s in the room across the bathroom with me [rooms were connected by a conjoining bathroom]. I have no roommate which is both nice and lonely. I don’t mind the privacy though. [stopped writing, went back to it later] Actually, change of plans, I just got a roommate. Her name is Valeria and she’s from Mexico. Today we didn’t really do anything. Tomorrow is when the fun should start I guess, that and the work. I miss Burn Notice. :P
July 19th, 2012
Second day. Exhausting. Really, really tiring. Today I had the alarm set for 7am, but my friend, Camilla, came into the room and somehow woke me up at 6:49am. I took a shower and decided to wear my hair curly. I went down to breakfast with Camilla and Jocelyn. Because we’re sister cities with them and Uruapan, we do our workshops together. I’m pretty comfortable with this group of people. Then we went on a Hollywood tour. It was the most miserable experience of my life! It was hot and crowded and I was with a group of people I didn’t know and were very friendly so I kinda just walked around with them, bored. Then we got back, had dinner, and then a scavenger hunt, it was fun! I mean we lost, but I was with people I knew and liked. My “group” right now is me, Camilla, Jocelyn, and Rozee, a counselor [chaperone] from Lethbridge. She’s 24 and really awesome because she hangs out with us and talks to us instead of being with adults. She’s cool. She speaks Arabic. She’s studying psychology and has a degree in biochemistry so we talked about that for a while on our trip off campus. There is like a coffee/ice cream shop a few streets off campus so we walked over and got ice-cream at like 9pm and got back at 10. It was cool because we weren’t breaking any rules, we had an adult/chaperone with us, but I mean we felt like we were just with a teenager. Well when we got back I just showered and now I’m writing in this and listening to music. I’m sleepy though, so I think I’ll sleep now. Goodnight!
July 20th, 2012
Day three. I just took a shower and we’re about to go hang out in Rozee’s room. Today we got up at 7, had breakfast and had a workshop on poverty and environment and it was interesting to see the difference in opinions and views on these things from the three different perspectives by country. (Canada, Mexico, USA) I think I have a slight advantage because not only do I understand when the kids speak Spanish, but I feel like I can understand their situation well enough (corruption, drug trafficking, poverty) because of my family down there. We had lunch and then we went to a highway next to LAX and El Segundo and did weeding and picking up trash in the middle of it. It was hot and kinda scary because of all the cars speeding by, but it got fun because I was with Camilla and Rozee and we started singing “Lean on Me” and it was great! [some time later] I just got back from hanging out in Rozee’s room actually. She was doing Jocelyn’s hair and Camilla, Valeria, and I were listening to music. We had a mini dance party and I skyped with my parents so they talked to everyone. It was good. Now were back in my room and Camilla is here on her computer and then we’re gonna go to bed. I’ve been having a good time, but I’m kinda ready to go home and take a shower in my own bathroom and sleep in my own bed. :) AND watch Burn Notice of course.
July 21st, 2012
Day four. Not as tired as yesterday. WE got in our groups by city for our projects in the workshop today. Our project is going to be a jogathon/walkathon (Relay For Life type) event to raise money to donate to a nearby homeless shelter. It seems like a pretty reasonable project and I think we can do it. [project changes in later date] We went down to Santa Monica to the aquarium (which was kinda lame), we let the people feel the beach and the water. It was so fun to watch! :P Then we headed over to the 3rd Street Promenade where Jocelyn and Rozee did the shopping. I kinda just toured them around. We came home late and exhausted to a short, hilarious dinner. WE had some kids from Mexico sit with us and Jocelyn was trying to talk to David [Carlos David], but she was going to fast, so I had to translate and I was so busy talking that I couldn’t even eat myself! After dinner we had a reflection and then I took a shower and Camilla and I headed out to Rozee’s room so she could braid my hair. She did successfully after two tries! Then we kinda just hung around looking at pictures and Camilla eventually passed out on the floor and the time is 1am and I’m like :O It’s late and we were not “supposed” to be out of our rooms, but technically we were in our chaperone’s room, so we were supervised. It was funny trying to come back to our room without getting caught. Then I packed because tomorrow were getting picked up by our host families and going home! Should be fun! :D
July 22nd, 2012
First day of home stays. We got picked up, well actually because we went to bed so late, I kinda slept through my alarm and Valeria was like “I thought you were dead! But then I say you breathing!” It was funny. We had a quick breakfast and then got picked up. We came home (Jocelyn is loving it), listened to music as we unpacked, then we went down to the pool for a swim. We took her to In N’ Out and she LOVED it. I was so happy. We then got ready for this dinner, in our honor, 130 guests! We ended up sitting outside in the cold (me, Lizzy, Jocelyn, and Camilla, and Rozee) we ate dinner and talked and talked and talked. It was fun though. And hilarious because our group kept on changing. People would leave to another and come and join ours. It was also weird that the waiter was hitting on me. First I thought he was hitting on Rozee, like yesterday [the Journey guy at Santa Monica] but no, it was me! So awkward. Her and Lizzy were laughing at me. Interesting I guess. We’re going to Sony tomorrow and downtown Culver. So I’m super excited! Should be a blast.
July 23rd, 2012
Home stay day 2. So we went to Sony Studios today and toured it and it was really awesome. I’ve never been in it before so I thought it was so interesting and new. Loved it so much. We had lunch at Jackson Marker which was great as well. Yummy and pretty. We went to the ECO Station and saw a bunch of cool animals and pet some of them (the reptiles scared me). We toured City Hall which was nice, and then we at dinner at Grand Casino. I had empanadas and they were yummy. As always. We had a city council meeting thing where we were honored and got certificates by the mayor of Culver City and council members. I learned today that Shauna [our facilitator] is a big old movie fan and a BIG Jimmy Stewart fan. It’s nice to get to geek out with someone about old movies so I enjoyed that. I got to get all dressed up as well. Which I LOVED. Tomorrow is casual and after the day, Jocelyn is going to meet Andrea and we’re going to dinner together. I’m excited. Also! We’re going to Disneyland on Saturday! SOOO EXCITED you don’t even know. I can’t wait to go. Really, I can’t!
June 24th, 2012 [supposed to be July]
Home stay day 3. Today was a shorter day, but slower and tiring. In the morning we had this presentation on the Ballona Creek Renaissance program/service that we’ll be doing tomorrow. It was kinda boring and got me really sleepy. We had lunch at Denny’s, and also our workshop there as well. We changed ideas for the project. Now it’s more realistic and attainable. We’re going to raise money for Culver Park by doing those boxes in classrooms and bake sales at school. We then went to the Baldwin Hills Scenic Overlook which was fun. We took a lot of pictures and had a good time joking around as always. WE got home, Andii [Andrea] came over and we went to put our feet in the Jacuzzi and then my parents took the three of us to get BBQ ribs for dinner. It was SO YUMMY. We also walked around Marina Del Rey and sang in the car on the way home. It was very fun and I really enjoyed myself. Now we’re watching a movie, waiting for Andii to get picked up. WE still need to shower and I’m dying to go to bed. So sleepy and tired. Oh well. Tomorrow is going to be boring as well. I can’t wait until Thursday and Friday! I’ll tell you about it later I guess.
July 25th, 2012
I can’t really say I enjoyed today very much. We cleaned up the Ballona Creek, which wasn’t very fun and learned about more pollution and weeded by the school. We also went to this lagoon which I had been to multiple times when I was in summer camp for lunch, so I didn’t really find it interesting. The one good part about the day was the morning and night. At 3am-ish we had a 3.8 earthquake and it actually woke me up and I was at first worried about Jocelyn because I thought “oh my gosh she’s going to freak out”, but she didn’t. She was super excited about it. I wasn’t scared; I was mainly more concerned about falling back asleep. And now, we just got home from Universal City Walk with the boys (Venkat, Tony, Cole, and Carlos). We had a good time and just walked around. I bought a black and pink snap back so I’m wearing it tomorrow to the Getty and beach. It should be great tomorrow.
July 26th, 2012
I feel like a zombie right now. The tiredness has hit me. So today was tons of fun. In the morning we went to the Getty Museum which was nice because I hadn’t been there in a while. I also learned a lot because Rozee knew some of the ancient stories that went with the paintings we saw as well as biblical references. After eating lunch there, we headed over to the beach. I saw, like actually inside of the water, and then just chilled on a towel. It was nice. Then almost everyone went home and Rozee, Jocelyn, and I, and Cole and Carlos David stayed and chilled as well. Then, my parents picked the three girls up and took us to In N’ Out for Rozee to try. She liked it. We then came home and went to the pool/Jacuzzi and heard the story of Rozee and her boyfriend. So cute! Anyways, afterwards, we met up with Kelsi at the mall and shopped a little. I got a blazer for DC. I’m exhausted, but can’t wait for tomorrow and all of the little kids! But now, I need sleep and lots and lots of rest.
July 30th, 2012
So we’re in DC now. The past two days I didn’t have time to write, so I’ll catch you up now. On Friday we went to the Mar Vista Family Center and volunteered with some pre-schoolers, and then little kids, and then people our own age. The preschoolers were adorable! We acted out a story for them and then colored and dance around with them. They were so cute! The other part of the day wasn’t as interesting. We did spend the whole day there. That night we went home and packed and watched the end of the opening ceremony of the Olympics. The next morning Rozee came over and the three of us went to DISNEYLAND! [left out Donna’s pot luck. See end notes to hear more about it] It was so much fun. I forgot how great that park is. I had so much fun but we came home exhausted. The worst part, the next morning we had to be at the airport by 5am. We went to bed at 1am and I was a complete zombie this morning, but we said our goodbyes and boarded the plane. I saw with two strangers ( :( ) but it was fine because I slept and got some homework done. We were brought to the American University (which isn’t as fantastic as UCLA). We have to all share a bathroom on one floor. Bl Ugh, oh well. We took a night tour of the monuments. We saw the Jefferson and Lincoln ones up close and took pictures. I took a shower and was hanging out in Rozee’s room as she unpacked. The biggest problem I have right now is the time zone. It is three hours ahead of California in DC and so it’s 1:13 am here, when my body is telling me that it’s only 10:13. Not sleepy, but I’ll try and get some rest. I guess…
July 30th, 2012 [July 1st]
And just when I thought it couldn’t get any more hot and humid! It was horrible today. Hot and muggy. We went to the State Department and had this interesting presentation by some people who work with the social affairs relating to Canada and Mexico. We then walked around with an intern, Jessica, for Sister Cities, and we walked from the Lincoln Memorial down to the WWII Memorial which I hadn’t seen so I enjoyed it a lot. We got to put our feet in the fountain and it was very refreshing. That’s pretty much all we did. We came back, did a reflection and kinda just hung out.
July 31st, 2012
Today the weather wasn’t as bad, thankfully. Because I ended up going to sleep late last night, I didn’t really want to wake up, BUT I did. I had kinda a gross breakfast, so I didn’t enjoy that. The workshop today was fun though. And very interesting and helpful. We had lunch and then I took a nice little nap and caught up on some of my reading thankfully. We took the metro downtown and it started to pour rain for like 10 minutes, and then it stopped. It was funny. We got to the DC Central Kitchen where we worked from about 4 to 8. I don’t think I’ve even seen or chopped so many tomatoes in my life. I hated it. I don’t want to see a tomato for a long time now. I also helped pick the good lemons from the moldy ones. It was so disgusting. We came back and then did the usual. Shower, hang out, gossip, yadda yadda.
August 1st, 2012
It feels like the DC portion of the trip should almost be over, but we’ve still got a quite a few more days. We had breakfast and a workshop again. It was fun because we got to use chalk on a blackboard and I mean we did all of our work, but we went a little chalk happy and drew all over the board. It was so much fun. We had to get ready so fast and we had to pack our lunch in a to-go box and eat on the bus because we had meeting with representatives of the Senate. It was kind of boring, but fun to dress up. Then, we split up. The Canadians went to the Canadian Embassy (jealous) and I went with Shauna and another group and we went to an art museum and the Natural History Museum and then came back and ate a nice dinner. We had an interesting evening activity/reflection which involved post it notes and grouping people together by what you saw on their forehead. We came back and Jocelyn and I showered in the men’s restroom because it wouldn’t be busy and there were no guys on our floor. Rozee braided my hair afterwards and we went to play cards in our “secret hiding spot”. It was fun, but then room check came along and we have to go to bed. :( Oh well, I’ll do some homework first.
August 2nd, 2012
I enjoyed today a lot actually. We had a workshop in the morning about PSA’s and types of government, which I feel comfortable and knowledgeable to talk about so I wasn’t nervous about saying anything. We went down to SCI HQ [Sister Cities International] pretty much where they gave us Subway and we sat around this huge conference table and talked about our experiences with this program and took lots of pictures. I enjoyed it a lot. We then walked past the White House and took pictures and then went to Georgetown. It wasn’t as exciting as I thought it would be. We shopped around and I bought a book for my dad to fill in. I’m still looking for souvenirs for me and my mom, but I’m sure I’ll find some later. Rozee did my hair again in a really cool bun and Jocelyn made popcorn so it was very yummy. I kinda want to go home, but I’m starting to really dread saying goodbye. I know it’s going to be crazy sad and I’m not excited for it at all. :(
August 3rd, 2012
I actually really liked today. We went to Capitol Hill in the morning and got to go inside! It was so beautiful and wonderful. The rotunda was amazing. We didn’t meet the person we were supposed to meet, though. After Capitol Hill, we went to the Library of Congress which was just amazing as well and it kinda reminded me of why I fell in love with the city in the first place. We went to this organization, the OAS [Organization of American States] and the guy who did part of the presentation was SO CUTE! Oh my God! All of us came out saying how cute he was and even Rozee was smiling for a while. It was so funny. We went shopping and had dinner at Union Station. I got all of my souvenir shopping done finally so I’m happy. I got books at the Library of Congress, a present for home, and a hoodie for me! I’m so not sleepy and not looking forward to 2 workshops tomorrow.
August 6th, 2012
So I missed writing in this last night because I didn’t have enough time. We went to a baseball game (The Washington Nationals against the Miami Marlins) and we won! We took the metro there and back and on the way back it was so full it was scary. We got back late too. I finished showering at 1am and stayed up talking to Rozee until 3. We also had our last two workshops that day as well. It was nice and we’re ready to begin our project. Today, we went to Mount Vernon (George Washington’s plantation home) which was fun. We took a lot of pictures. We then went to Old Town Alexandria, which in my opinion, was just like Georgetown. I liked it. We came home and had our last reflection. Oh my God. I don’t remember crying so much in such a long time. We had to write about what part of the program made the most impact on us and once one person started crying, we all did. By the end of it we were bawling our eyes out. Some of the things people said were very sad and apparently some of the things I said made people cry too. I don’t really remember what I said exactly. Oh something special that happened today was that Rozee bought me, Camilla, Jocelyn, Abby and well herself, matching rings that say “dream” on them. They’re so pretty and they meant a lot to me. I’m so scared to say goodbye to everyone. I really am. I hope all goes well.
August 7th, 2012
The program is over pretty much. Currently, I’m sitting in the airport in DC waiting to board our flight. Yesterday was the last day and a long one at that. We went to the zoo, which was fun. We came back in the afternoon and got ready for the banquet thingy. [Fell asleep and traveled, continued writing when I got home] We showered and Rozee did my hair and we all headed down together. We got a kick out of the fact that Rozee sat with the other chaperones. She sat at the “big kids table”. We had a catered meal (it was fine) and saw a slideshow of pictures of the trip with depressing music. Ha ha. We also had a mini-talent show. Camilla sang, Lupe and Jesus and Tony all sang mariachi. We all danced for a little. They gave out certificates as well (I got “the  Most Canadian award”) and then Angus spoke to us, he was almost crying at it was all very heartwarming and sweet. We took pictures afterwards and headed up to our rooms. We changed and finished packing completely and then went to Rozee’s room to hang out. We figured it was already 1am, there was no point in sleeping for two hours [we had to be down in the lobby by 3:15am], so we decided to pull an all-nighter, talking, doing nails, and playing cards. 3:30am we left AU [American University] and headed to the airport. We were so confident that we wouldn’t have to say goodbye so early because our flights weren’t until like 9 and 10am. But no, the first stop was to drop off the Canadians at Air Canada. I swear I got a sinking feeling in my stomach when Angus said we had to say goodbye right then and there. Rozee was the first person who hugged me and I immediately started crying. I really don’t remember what we said. I hugged Camilla as well and told her I’d be seeing her soon. We got off of the bus and I said goodbye to some other people and then hugged Rozee again, she told me not to cry, but I really couldn’t help it. My heart broke when I hugged Jocelyn goodbye, but I tried to be strong and told her I’d be up in Canada next summer and that it wasn’t goodbye forever. I was sobbing and I thanked Rozee for everything, got one last hung, and had to get back on the bus. I was probably bawling my eyes out. I looked out of the window and saw Rozee waving at me and I waved back, crying harder and we pulled away, waving [at everyone we left behind] and crying. The bust had the most depressing sound of everyone crying and sobbing. Then it was our turn. We said goodbye to everyone else and checked in (eyes read and swollen) and said our final goodbyes to Angus and Shauna and went to our terminal. I got Dunkin’ Donuts (coffee and a croissaint) and we eventually crashed in the terminal. We boarded the plane and again I sat with two strangers, but I fell asleep so it was okay. We had a connection in Dallas, but didn’t have to get off of the plane. I sat next to Venkat on that flight and we both slept. I got home to my mom picking me up. I was happy to see her, but still sad about my goodbyes. Even today I feel sad. I’m still wearing my  “dream” ring, listening to the music Rozee recommended me, thinking about them all the time, but trying to not be too sad because I know I will see them again. I just know it.
-August 9th, 2012-
“Dream and dream big.” –Rozee
“You are not alone.” –Angus
“Nobody said it was easy, it’s such a shame for us to part,
Nobody said it was easy, no one ever said it would be this hard,
Oh, take me back to the start.” –Coldplay “The Scientist”

Sunday, July 8, 2012

Summer 2012

It's summer and I'm back!
I don't know if you're glad, but I know I sure am.
No school, no waking up and going to sleep at designated times, and endless fun.
I want this summer to be great and I think it will.
That's not what I wanted to talk about though. I've had something on my mind lately, something I have noticed about myself, and I just feel the need to write about it.

"Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of someone else." -Judy Garland

I find this quote very interesting. Very, true. For most people. Nobody wants to be a copy, we've been raised in a society where we are preached to be unique since as long as we can be remember. The irony is, when you're too unique for someone's taste, you are looked down upon. How does that work? I agree with this quote. I think a person should be their own individual, but to find themselves, I don't think it's always an epiphany. Hey! I've figured it out! This is what I want to look like. This is who I want to be. I mean, I'm not saying that a situation like that can't happen, but using me as an example, it doesn't happen that way.

Let me tell you, I'm the first to praise individuality. I love just walking around and looking at the differences I see between the people in the street. I find it wonderful. Yes, some of those differences I might not like, they may scare me (lots of tattoos and lots of piercings), or I just dislike them (girl covered in head to toe Justin Bieber or One Direction fan equipment), but hey, if that's their thing, so be it. I'm not gonna tell them to change. Who would I be if I did that? No, I let them go and just keep observing other things.

For me I think it's taken a while to find myself. Of course I can't say I've completely found myself already, at this young age of 15, but I can tell you for the time being, I sure as heck know who I am. I'm comfortable with my group of friends at school, with my best friend in another state, with my family, with my grades, with my activities, and with the things I like. My style and personality is something that changes day to day, but I find it's reached a point where it's pretty constant. How?

Well, going back to the quote. I want to be myself. Of course I do. But for me, being myself means taking little things from different people I observe and putting them together to form my own thing. What does that even mean? I'll just give some examples and explain. Enjoy! Tell me what you think.

 Michael Jackson. 
Okay I'm going to talk about him as an inspiration to my personality, but I do have to admit, style-wise, I do want sparkly white socks, a Thriller Letterman's jacket, and I did recently buy reflective Aviators because I really liked them when I saw them on him, but that's not the point. Here's the point. I started liking Michael years ago. One of my closest friends had a huge crush on him and like almost anyone, I was a fan of the music. Recently, I started looking into him, reading about him, watching things about him, and of course watching his performances. Let me tell you this, and I know so many people could argue with me, but I'm not writing this to argue with anybody. He was an amazing person. A truly amazing and good person. Point is, I think about him every day. I think about how he tried to change the world and help everybody he could. I want to do that, maybe not to his extent, but if it means picking up the mail that fell from the hands of an elderly woman while I'm walking my dog. Or if it just means smiling at the person I pass on the street. I want to be that person that everyone just remembers as the friendly, smiling, warm girl they knew at school. And I've succeeded at that this year. One of the seniors that graduated this past June, she told me, made me cry, about how she's really going to miss me when she goes to college because every morning I'd see her in the halls. And every morning I would smile at her. Now I can't say we are close friends, but I like her and she likes me. And she told this to me, as we were saying goodbye telling me to not change for anything in the world because my smile would cheer her up on days she just wanted to cry in the morning. I never thought about it like that. I never thought that someone could be having a dreadful morning and just by seeing someones smile, they could feel a tiny bit better. And I thank Michael because of that, because I know, he would have done the same thing.

Jackie Kennedy.
Another person I admire and am inspired by more for her personality than her style. Again, I will admit, when I get all dressed up, yes I think of how amazing and beautiful she looked every day of her life and I have two colleges of her pictures by the mirror I look at when I get ready everyday to remind me to look nice, but again, that's not the point. She's another one who has affected my personality greatly. When I'm having a bad day, or when someone is saying something to me I don't like I've learned to ignore it. I've learned that from someone I've never met, but spent an immense amount of time observing. While an entire nation wept and mourned, she held together for everyone, even though she probably felt the most pain. Losing a loved one can never be easy. Losing the love of your life and having to go on with your life is some degree of pain I could never begin to imagine. Then, losing the person who gave you strength so soon after. She is the most admirable woman I can think of.

There may be little things I say and do that I've taken on from a movie I'v seen or a book I've read, or most likely a television show I've watched, but like I said, those things keep changing. But when I need a reassurance about who I am or what I'm doing, I think of him.

Johnny Depp. 
He is just somebody I turn to when I need that little nudge of you are yourself and nobody can change that. One of his biggest fears is to be labeled as something. He's truly and individual. And I hate that a lot of people dislike him because of it.
He's got his sense of style, his way of being, and it works for him, so people should leave it at that.

Now moving onto style. I feel like I've started to realize what my style is and just build it. I can't say I'm completely a t-shirt and jeans type of girl, but I can be. I can also be a sundress type of girl. Or a pair of jean shirts and a blouse. Or leggings, shorts, a v-neck, and my much beloved combat boots that have a zipper keeps opening. My style changes, a lot, but I've found people I like to take ideas from.

Paris Jackson.
Style wise, I admire her style. I really like it. I can't pull it off because my interests don't lie in punk rock bands, eyeliner, and black nail polish. I take little things from her, though. First of all, I think she's really pretty. I really do. Well let's start with this picture, I just bought a hat/cap thing yesterday just like the one she's wearing. Well not that one, it's a Vans cap, but its that style. The "cool kid caps" as they seem to be at my school. Frankly, I just like how they look when girls wear them, and so I got one. I like the band tees she wears, and I want some. When I go shopping, I look for the ones I like.

Oh, the so called hipsters. How I love my hipster boys. They are delicious to look at. As for the girls, the outfit in this picture is something I'd love to wear. I've got the jeans, I don't own any pairs of jeans that aren't skinny, and I love the rest of the outfit. And the hair. How I love the hair. How I love everybody else's hair, but my own. Point being, from this outfit I own the jeans and the glasses. I'd probably wear a different top and converse and no hat, but I've taken something from it.

Fiona Glenanne.

I had to write Fiona because saying Gabrielle Anwar, the actress who plays the character, would not be accurate. Mainly because, the outfits I see and like come from what I see and like on the show Burn Notice rather than what Gabrielle wears in her day to day life. I picked the two pictures because as for the top one, I would love love love to have that outfit. I own a pair of black shorts with suspenders, but the denim looks really nice. And the bottom picture, for my personal preference, I would like the exact same outfit, but in darker colors, minus the I-don't-even-wanna-know-how-many-inch heels. If only California really was sunny and warm all year round. Another thing I've taken from the show is wearing sundresses. For example, I'm wearing one now, and I really like it. It's comfortable and fresh and pretty. I'm into a nice summer dress with sandals.

The bracelets, I will give credit, well half-credit to Gabrielle for. I love wearing a lot of bracelets. I love the earthy toned ones, a lot like the ones I'd imagine her wearing.Someone told her in an interview she was like a hippie in her lifestyle. I've always loved the hippie look, the band around the forehead with the wavy long hair, the flowy tops, the nature-y aspect of it. I think it looks nice and I think that's why I go for the brown and leather's for bracelets.

We don't know her real name on the show Leverage, but she's played by the actress Beth Riesgraf . In this picture she's wearing the red dress and white blazer thing. I liked this picture mainly because that would be a dress I would definitely wear to a party/special occasions. I own a lot of tight dresses like it, I just wouldn't wear the sweater on top. Her style on the show consists of a lot of pants and blouses, or jeans and hoodies, something real casual. That's what I wear a lot of the time to school, a hoodie and some leggings. Or just jeans and a long sleeved shirt.