Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Late Night Writing...

So I was just laying on my bed, and because my laptop doesn't work without a cable for the internet, the only thing I could do was open Microsoft Word and write.. these are my random thoughts and ideas... and a mini vignette as I'm calling it. I hope you enjoy. You know I love comments!


L is lust
L is looks
L is the lasting feelings I have for you.
O is outside, where I think of you the most
O is only you…the one I think of the most.
V is vivacious
V is vida, what I’d give to meet you.
E is your eyes
E is the evenings I would love to spend with you
E is every breath I take, every breath you take away from me
E is everything.

M is mine… you’ll never really be mine, but you are in my eyes.
I is indifferent. I don’t care what goes on around me when I think of you.
C is calm. Your calmness the state you put me in.
H is having you. What I would do to hold you.
A is amazing. That’s what you are.
E is every little thing I see you do, that makes me fall all over again.
L is the love and lust I feel for you.

I see you.  I bump into you. I didn’t mean it. I said I’m sorry. You say its no problem. I get lost in your eyes. It electricity that I feel when you look at me. I know you feel the same thing. You help me up from my place on the floor. I feel a shock when your skin brazes mine. I get up, trying not to depend on you too much. I cant do that… ill probably never see you again. I smile and thanks you…I wish I could do more… I wish I could kiss you. I don’t even think of an autograph I just think of your touch. Something more memorable than a signature, an intense feeling that burned my skin, and a hole right to my heart. I want to see you again. I do. At a park. I want to say hello, but I’m scared. You say hello instead. You ask me to sit. And talk. I comply. I sit. I listen to you talk. I could do it all day. It gets late. Very late. I don’t want to go home. I don’t need to go home. My parents trust me. You ask me if I need a ride, then when I say I walked…you offer to walk me back. I say sure. We walk, I trip a couple of times. I’m nervous. You hold me for support while I stop tripping, you hold my hand. Eventually, you don’t let go. Were walking home, holding hands. It’s a miracle you could say. I stopped being nervous. I stopped caring. I just focused on your touch. I reach my house. I tell you so. A pretty house. A house alone. My parents are out, you notice the car gone. You don’t say anything. You think my thoughts. I ask you inside. I’m thirsty, I go to the kitchen to get water. You’re in the living room looking at my old family photos. Me as a kid. You smile. That smile….that beautiful smile that can turn me into a pile of mush. I could die. I shakily offer you a glass of water. Thank you. You thank me in the kindest most sincere way I could ever dream of hearing. Just for a glass of water. Im head over heels. I’m scared. Are you? I don’t know. Probably not. But you’re here. That counts for something. Right? Right… I hope so. I sit on the couch. I cant stay still. You notice it. Are you okay? You sound concerned. I feel your love. I smile and nod. Of course I am. You’re here. Of course. You say you probably should go. Its getting late. You have work. I nod. Of course. You’re a busy man. You’re a successful man. Why are you wasting time with me? You don’t love me. You cant love me. Do you love me? If only I knew… I open the door. I’m scared. You’re leaving. What if I don’t see you again. You smile. You send me to the moon and back with that smile. A genuine thanks is uttered from your lips. I feel butterflies… real fluttering beautiful butterflies. I don’t want it to end. A kiss. A kiss? A kiss. That’s what you left me with. A tender, sweet, achingly slow, long kiss. I sigh. Was I imagining it? Probably. Its happened countless times. But, you’re still here. You’re looking at me in a way I’ve never seen before. Maybe I’m imagining it. But you’re still here. I didn’t realize your arms were around me, or that I had moved so close to you. How did that happen. I don’t remember. When I realize it I step back. Frightened? No. Surprised? No. Then what. I’m amazed. Amazed at what had just happened. Amazed that it could happen. Amazed that you’re still here, looking at me. Loving me.